frostedsammy:

lvysaur:

Isn’t it weird how glue doesn’t get stuck to the container it’s in

CAN YOU FUCKING NOT

(Source: engineerings)

OK so basically a girl posted a photo of herself pretending to be on the phone and she got like 1,000 notes within minutes. Well i’m pretending to be on the phone and getting dragged away by the demon from Paranormal Activity so yeah

I deserve notes ok

softgrungepuppy:

softgrungepuppy:

once when i was 6 my aunt took me shopping and she said “i like these shoes can you carry them out the shop for me” and i didn’t really know how shops worked so i did and then the shop assistant came over when the alarm when off and i started crying and she said “dont worry sweetie it’s just a pair of shoes you can keep them” and that is how i got away with my first robbery

keep this on the down low because i wanna get into a good college

windowswide:

don’t ever let white boys who wear flip flops tell you shit

sunshineandrainbowsandlolipops:

askdaleksec2:

magicmanula:

Who polishes the Daleks anyway?

WE MUST LOOK OUR BEST FOR EACH BAT-TLE!

is that swiffer

achronicmasturbator:

Never trust an atom they make up everything.

ohnoshedihnt:

That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto-correct is like “I got nothing, man.”

first of all, who allowed me on the internet

(Source: absoluutebliss)

reginamas:

i just told my mom i died at birth and i’ve been a ghost this entire time just growing and manifesting into the daughter she’d lost

and she’s just like

well please go to the light because i am tired of your shit

(Source: redscalpels)

kanyewesticle:

my new years resolution is for everyone else to gain 50 pounds

emergencydaleks:

methlabrador:

i wish i was an airplane pilot because at random points during the flight i would go on the intercom and just scream 

#i worry about most of you guys getting jobs

the-absolute-funniest-posts:

tupacvevo:

Via/Follow The Absolute Greatest Posts…ever.

(Source: coldhands-heartonfire)

As an European citizen and fan, i feel deeply offended by the fact my first ever and still almost ultimate bias would rather have a concert in Africa first.

(Source: onlyfagshavethisurl)